Lessons from Undergrad

I graduated from the Washington State University Honors college in December of 2022. In the weeks and holiday season that have followed, I have spent time reflecting on what I learned there, the people I interacted with, and the many special moments I experienced. This post outlines my 5 most valuable lessons so you can have a chance to learn from them as well.

1. Letting go

The most essential thing you can do for yourself is to let go. Let go of the expectations you feel others have about who you should be. Let go of the idea that you already know exactly who you are and expect to stay the same person as you age. Let go of the idea that you can’t or shouldn’t change. Let go of the assumptions you have about others and yourself, especially when it comes to what you can achieve. Let go of the anger you hold towards others and yourself – this is energy that can be put towards bettering yourself. Let go of the idea of only achieving highly – without failure we can’t appreciate our success and we have nothing to motivate us to do better. Let go of people who don’t lift you up. Let go of bad habits. It is never too late to let go of anything that isn’t serving you well, it will benefit your mind and wellbeing, it will help you accomplish more than you could ever dream.

2. Belief

Belief (A.K.A. trust) is essential. Believe in yourself, in others and in the process. Often, I would find myself in moments where I truly doubted that I would graduate, pass a class, make friends, connect with my professors, or learn anything from a class that felt irrelevant to my future. In these moments, instead of blindly trusting the whole of the situation, I developed little grains of belief. Trust is essential to life. Trust is hard to build and easy to lose. Trust in yourself is the most difficult. Doubt infiltrates thought on a daily basis. I cultivated trust in myself by believing in and focusing on little steps that I could take, instead of the whole class, person, or process. By building trust and belief in all those facets slowly, I came to trust the whole.

3. The importance of fun

Without fun, we have no way to experience passion and joy, let alone live a fulfilling life. While many people feel satisfied within their lives, satisfaction isn’t the same as joyful fulfillment. Identifying the activities and people that lead you to joyful fulfillment is essential. Don’t waste your time, in college or in life, doing voluntary activities or spending time with people who don’t fill you up. Your time is precious, we each have a finite amount, and if we spend it doing that which we feel obliged to do, from either internal or external pressures, we drain ourselves in moments when we should be recharging. Instead, focus on the people and things that excite you and fill you with energy, and you will be surprised at what a difference it will make.

4. Rest

Rest and fun are similar. Rest, however, requires you to truly disengage from all the stresses of work or school, take time for yourself away from friends, and fully reset your mind. In our society, I observe that rest has taken on a label of laziness and/or selfishness. With such labels we can find ourselves feeling guilty when we indulge in full rest. When I started integrating rest into my routine, I would often feel that I should be getting in an extra hour of studying or cleaning my apartment when I had already spent time doing both. To combat this, I would place in my schedule 30-60 minutes at least once a week, if not every day, where I was assigned time to rest. This helped me feel less guilty, combat burnout and come back to my schoolwork and other responsibilities with a fresh mind, resulting in greater productivity.

5. Life is evolution

Life is never going to go exactly how you plan it. Planning can help life go smoother, and helps you be prepared and have a clear path forward, but sometimes the best moments and memories are spontaneous. Life hurts a lot. It comes with pain and heartbreak and frustration. This is part of living as a human being, and it is ok to feel negative emotions. Life is also awe inspiring, joyful, and wonderful. Looking at colorful fall leaves, and snow that falls as big as gumballs, you get to experience first kisses with lovely people and watch your friends reach their goals. Hold these moments and cherish them, you are allowed to be joyful and happy. Life is ever-changing – expect surprises, expect disappointments. Change is constant, we are ever evolving, and in these moments, we get to meet ourselves again and again and learn about who we are, what we believe, what we hold valuable and what we want to do with our time here on earth.

I hope these lessons I learned give you a new perspective to consider. Apply them to your life at your leisure.

Kayla

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